Busy Being Busy: Reflection of an Overachiever

I have a confession to make. It's been something I have been dealing with for awhile *deep dramatic sigh*........I am what most people call an overachiever, and what I personally call a busy bee. Pretty sure you ladies and gents have heard this phrase thrown around plenty of times often time as a joke but for me it's been a way of life for as long as I can remember. I am the person that struggled with saying the word NO especially when I knew my plate was already full (PPS- People Pleaser Syndrome...we'll talk about that another time), I was that person that refused to delegate because I had the mentality "If I want it done RIGHT I have to do it myself"--- if you have had this thought like me (be honest with yourself) I can honestly say you may suffer from one or both of these problems, lack of TRUST or a spirit of PRIDE.

As for me it was a mixture, I didn't trust in others because I've occasionally been let down... I also really didn't like being DEPENDENT on someone else, the act of being vulnerable is something that scared the living stuff out of me. When it came to PRIDE I simply wanted all the praise & glory for whatever activity, I enjoy being complimented and all that jazz. How foolish was I! Knowing that my God is a jealous God and it's by his grace I have been given the ability and opportunity to do the things I do. If you guys haven't realize yet humans are unstable 0_0 the same voice we use to compliment we us to tear into shreds. The only stable approval we need in regards to our  life is that of Christ.

At the peak of my busy bee days you could find my head spinning in a million direction, moving at an abnormal speed, starting a hundred things but really not getting ANYTHING done. Just to get you to see what I am talking about we'll explore Undergrad life. I was a Resident Assistant, President of a Multicultural Student Union, Secretary of a faith based club, an employee in my Student Center, was in a committed relationship with a random, and a waitress at a restaurant....ohhhh almost forgot I was also a FULL-TIME student. Now to some of you that may not seem a lot but for ME it was so much because I often relied on my own energy rather than receiving help from those who truly wanted to help out. Most importantly through all of this...chaos...my relationship with my source of energy/life/peace/joy, my sustainer, GOD, was placed on the back burner. I was OVER IT all!

Are you currently feeling BURNED out? Do you feel like you are doing a million things but when you take inventory you realize nothing is truly getting done? I was in the same boat, and don't get me wrong I haven't arrived yet.... and won't be arriving it will always be a conscious effort to keep things in their proper time and place. But THANK GOD I am not where I used to be!!

There is nothing wrong with being a busy bee, the problem comes when things/activities take priority over what should be most important in your life which are GOD first and foremost and family (relationships). Does the saying "What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit his soul?" Mark 8:36 ESV ring a bell? I had a "light bulb moment" during my season of busy bee chaos---- WHY NOT ASK THE CREATOR OF TIME HIS INPUT ON HOW I SPENT THE TIME HES GIVEN ME? .........shocking to even consider this huh, well I decided to check out what the Bible says about time management----side note: figuring out that the Bible has answers for my current life has been mind-blowing.

Time Management Tips Biblical

1. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8- "For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under Heaven. A time to be born and a time to die. A time to plant and a time to harvest.....A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak. A time to love and a time to hate. A time for war and a time for peace."

Written by King Solomon aka "Wisest man in the World" during his later years as a reflection of his life, note a key point is made in these verses which is timing is everything. In our society today we have developed a "got to go" mentality, the faster the process, the easiest way to get it done is often time the option we choose. Multitasking has become an attribute that we try to do in every area of our life. When God says differently..... He states that there is a time/season for everything under the Heaven so (TIP 1: Stop rushing the process and give each thing in your life its proper time to grow....stop the pesticide mentality). Recognize that time is a GIFT not a RIGHT and learn to seek, accept, and walk in God's perfect timing.

2. 2 Peter 3:8- "But do not look this one fact, beloved, that WITH the Lord one day is as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day"

I don't know about you guys but this verse just blows my mind. The word of God says "In the beginning GOD CREATED" there was nothing before He decided to speak and that includes TIME. God is the creator of time, but he is not constrain by it, He has the ability to work in and out of it. This is the God we serve! So this brings me to ( TIP 2: Invite God into your daily living & decision the small and the big!) As I type this know that this is directed towards me as well, but doesn't it just make sense to walk with the Creator of Time rather than fight against Him. Don't let your fear of being let down, vulnerable, or your pride to get  in the way. Please don't. For it continues to say in verse 9 "The Lord is not slow to fulfill his promise as some count slowness, but is patient toward you...."  God is a gentleman he will not force you to walk with him but he will patiently wait for you.

3. Ephesians 1:10- "As a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in Heaven and things on earth."

You may be completely different from me but when I was busy being busy I was extremely lonely. I was so stuck on doing things alone that I miss out on opportunities to share in moments with loved ones. (All though not all activities is for us to partake in, important for us to guard our gates Proverbs 4:23) I lost not only my peace of my mind, and almost my sanity but the blessing of unity. (TIP 3: Ask for help! Seek wise counsel on tasks before you say yes and invite people especially those who are invested in seeing you succeed with no desire of personal gain to give assistance)

If you are just not in the SPIRITUAL, relationship part........yet.......

below are "practical steps"

1. Learn to say NO with class. There is nothing wrong in recognizing that this extra project will just tip your balance scales completely off. Saying no with class requires sweetness and practice. If possible refer that person to someone that you believe that would be of assistance. Use your strong, honey voice. Do not be bullied or guilt trip into doing something you will resent later.

2. Plan AHEAD.  I can't even tell you guys how many times I accidentally double booked myself, a mistake that could easily have been avoided by checking my schedule. I don't know about you but writing things down doesn't work for me, it gets lost in the vortex of my purse. If you have a Smartphone and a Gmail account I highly recommend using the calendar tab. Set the time aside to put all your responsibilities, events, meetings etc.. in their and sync to your phone. You now have it accessible to you. Give yourself traveling and breathing time between each task 35-45 min. Another great app/tool wiggio. Thank me later =D

3. Create a rewards system. As human beings we like to feel good about things that we do. It's a fact,  reward systems have help us learn many lessons in life. Create a healthy one for yourself. For me I have a "post it note system". I use post-it notes, 3 colors---red, orange, blue to help me. Red: things that need to happen that day, no excuses....orange: medium priority things that can go to another day if pushed back however is placed as red following day, and blue: relational, positive things and encouragement that I want to get too as soon as possible.

4. Take inventory. Sometimes we have to do a check in, if you are physically burned out you are most likely no longer balance. Check in and rearrange your priorities. Take a breather, do an activity that gets you to de-stress i.e. walk in a park, workout, dance like a crazy person in your own space, listen to music. Then take a minute and write down everything that is going on in your life and go through that list and figure out what you took on that you don't necessarily HAD to and take proper action steps.

Love y'all,

Beloved: Whisper to a Lonely Heart

I remember a time when I truly believe that I was unlovable. I believed that love was a theory that alluded me every time I thought I came close to getting it. I remember that burning desire to just be understood, to hear someone say "I get it, you are not alone". Most importantly I remember that ever growing void in my heart that I tried to avoid, but that quickly swallowed me in it's lonely and dark embrace.

Have you ever felt this way? Felt alone in a crowded room? Like the puzzle that just couldn't fit? Center of attention but truly a hidden misery? One of the songs that I completely related to during that season of my life was Track of my Tears by Smokey Robinson (I am an oldie at heart =D) The beginning of the song says:

 "People say I'm the life of the party cause I tell a joke or two

All though I might be laughing loud and hearty, deep inside I'm blue

So take a good look at my face, you see my smile look out of place

if you look closer it's easy to trace the track of my tears"

These resonated so loudly with me. I was SO sick of living this double life, a life that outwardly seemed so beautiful but on the inside I was simply broken pieces taped together.

Then in the midst of all this chaos of emotions just when I just thought that I could not take another breath I heard deep inside a soft, loving voice whisper into my spirit

Beloved

The stillness silenced me and stop me right in my tracks, and I wondered "Am I going CRAZY??" Then again I heard so gently,

 " Beloved, come back to me"

I slowly began to realize that I was hearing the voice that I have been trying to silence for awhile, a voice that has been patiently waiting for me to listen, a voice that has been seeing all of my turmoil and pain and have been waiting for me to turn to His loving embrace. If you still haven't figured out the voice that I am talking of its, God, The great I AM, the Alpha and Omega, the Creator of all. This is what He said to me:

"Beloved I have watched as you have cried yourself to sleep, I have witness the moments where you considered your life to be nothing. And through it all I have never left your side. I have been waiting for you to return to me. Don't you understand how much you mean to me, how much I care for you, how much I love you. I sent my son Jesus Christ to die for you, to suffer, to be beaten and humiliated all so you can have LIFE and a relationship with me. A relationship where you are provided for and giving freedom to roll your cares to me. You are so precious to me, I took the time to create you, to give you a purpose. This is not what I want for you, this sadness, this emptiness is not of ME, it is what life without me feels like. I am the giver of life, peace, joy. I understand it all, all of those hidden pain in your heart I see it all.  Don't hide from me, return to me.....

Beloved come back home"

There aren't no words that can explain the relief that I felt. No words that can encompass the feeling of COMPLETE, UNCONDITIONAL love that I felt. How amaze was I to hear, know that the creator of the Heavens cared about little old me. That he cared about my pains and hurts. It felt like a burden was removed when I open my heart back to the One who made it. I don't know who this is for, or what you are going through now. I don't know the pains that you have endured, and the experiences that you have survived. What I do know is that your Heavenly Father misses you and the void in your life and in your heart can only be filled by Him. He is waiting patiently for YOU, just like he waited for me. So surrender, stop fighting aren't you just TIRED? I know I was.

Confess with your mouth and believe in your heart that Jesus Christ DIED for you, that he was crucified, and that on the third day he rose again with all power in his hand. Say it, "Jesus I believe that you are the Son of God. I believe you are my King, the Christ who died on the cross for me and rose again. I believe that you are alive and you are interceding on my behalf. Right now I ask that you forgive me for my sins and come to sit as the King of my heart and life" If you have made this confession, CONGRATS!! welcome to the Kingdom, to the body of Christ your journey has just begun. I hope my blog can be a help to you. If you did not feel ready for this confession I pray that your heart is softened and fear is cast not. Don't wait to return to His Love

Love y'all,