Love Dare: Challenge Accepted

I can not believe that it's already February!! For those of you who don't know this month is my BIRTHDAY month!! *does Happy Dance* and this year I am becoming 23 years wiser! I am that person that celebrates life everyday so I don't consider my birthday (February, 16th) to be a day of celebration because I start the party starts on the 1st and doesn't stop until March 1st =). I begin to think, what exactly should I do to celebrate my birthday?? Should I go out and dance the night away? Should I travel? Should I throw a big party? Should I do something spontaneously dangerous?......And then I hear deep in my spirit, a quiet still voice

"You should love"

"Well, I thought I did that?" I whispered back. Can I be honest with y'all I felt some type of way when this was place in my spirit. My God must have known that I wasn't receiving this message well because towards the end of the month of January I discovered a song. This song was so profound that not only did it inspire this love dare but it inspired me to make loving hard everyday a mission. The song "As Long as I'm Here" by Brandon Heath says....

Some day I'll pass through the great sky above
And the first thing I'll ask is how well did I love
Did I leave the world any better than it was before?
Of all the things I've done, could I have done any more?

How well did you Love? When it's your time to leave this world no one is going to list the amount of degrees you held or the businesses you started.... they are going to reflect on the memories you shared and the impact and legacy you left behind. The question is not going to be how well did you live but how impactful was your love in a world that is in desperate need of it.

So for my birthday month and as long it takes to make love a habit in your life, I am inviting you to a LOVE DARE. This is inspired by the movie "Fireproof" which I highly recommend you to watch. This movie is on Netflix .

For married folks: You guys can follow this dare to the T. This Dare was tailored specifically for YOU. If you are married and you decide to embark on this challenge, I challenge you to be silent. Allow your actions to speak, go through all 40 days of this challenge, journal and pour out the good and bad during your quiet time.

For Single Folks: I am a bold, radical believer in Jesus Christ. I believe in the teachings of the Bible, which means that I try to live my life with IT as my standard. I believe that marriage is a beautiful representation of the relationship between Christ and the Church, therefore it's a holy covenant that should be between a man and a woman. Until a man has paid the price for you known as marriage, he should not be getting husband benefits which means as a fellow sister of mine stated beautifully "NO WED, NO BED". So many of us are deceived into thinking that singleness is a curse. That is so far from the truth! We as singles are in a privilege position where we get to mature and work on different love relationships in our lives. We get to strengthen these support systems and create a network of accountability that will help you in seasons to come. Don't run away from the blessings and lessons of singleness because society is trying to tell you are incomplete. The fact of the matter is there are way to many INCOMPLETE individuals in "complete" relationships. So the LOVE DARE challenge for you is to seek out a family member who is estranged, that difficult sibling or parent, a friend, someone younger than you that you can pour love to. Tailor the dare to that relationship. To be honest there is not much change that needs to be done. Using it as an excuse just allows you to continue living in less than satisfying relationships.

It starts with YOU

Part of the challenge is to truly reflect on the changes you are seeing and the things you are feeling day to day. Use this challenge to go deeper in your quiet time. Jenny What's this Quiet Time you keep referring to? How do I go about doing it? I truly believe that when someone explains something better than you, don't try to beat a dead horse by trying to explain better. Humble yourself and use that person as a resource. I am blessed to be part of an amazing movement known as Pinky Promise. Founded by Heather Lindsey this movement inspires women to truly love and live this Christian life, by challenging singles to live a life of purity while single in a world that pushes the opposite and for the married women living a life of purity as keeper of her home (whatever that means to you and your husband according to your relationship and the Bible) and learning the true meaning and beauty of submission. She has an amazing blog which she talks about several topics one being quiet time. Check it out here: "How to Spend Time with God" by Heather Lindsey 

LOVE DARE RULES

1. Start on Day 1 and end with Day 40. The challenge builds on itself don't cheat yourself out by trying to skip around.
2. Give it your all. You don't want to wonder at the end of this "Could I have done more?"
3. Do it in secret. I love the book of Matthew starting from chapter 5 to chapter 6. Take time to read and reflect before jumping into this challenge. One of my favorite part of the teaching is Matthew 6:1 "Be careful not to practice your righteousness in front of others to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven"
4. Journal. Reflect and speak to God
5. Don't give up. Before it gets better it can sometimes get worse. True test of love is not loving someone who is lovable but someone that is difficult to love. Those are the people who need it the most.
6. Pass it on. Don't keep this challenge to yourself, all though the person that you decide to have as the receiving end of this challenge should be kept in the dark =) Someone else may need a challenge.
7. Print this. Love Dare
8. Officially starting on February 14th.

 The second greatest commandment given to us by JESUS is to LOVE. The Bible says that "They will know us by our love" not by our awesome knowledge of scripture and theology but how we live this thing out.

Love y'all,

I am your Server NOT your Servant!!!

"Hi...Welcome to _____ My name is---" inserts rude interruption: Can I have a coke with two ice cube? 4 slice lemons and a lime? A cup with boiling water?? New utensils? Some salad and breadsticks? And can I place my order now"... *patiently responds as I internally cringe* "Sure I can get all of that for you, by the way my name is Jenny and I have the pleasure of being your server for today"..... I love my job. I say this with a hint of sarcasm because In all honestly I do enjoy what I do because I realize it is preparation for even greater, it's a flexible field, I create my own schedule, I can walk out with my money in my pockets, I interact with hundreds of guest everyday, I am learning the art of effective multitasking and so much more. But there are those days when certain guests or situations  make you want to scream, "I AM YOUR SERVER NOT YOUR SERVANT!!" While proceeding to flips tables on your way out.... That might be a tad bit extreme.... but it feels like that sometimes and I think I made my point.

You may not be blessed to be a server like I am *inserts smile* but you may be in a field, work or school environment where sometimes you may feel abused, overworked, under appreciated and frustrated. You want to scream and rebel and cause absolute mayhem as you make a fabulous exit----and then reality sets in and you realize...ohhh I'm not part of a TV show and I do have real big girl/boy bills to pay that won't go away simply because I rashly decided to have a fabulous exit.

I have been a server for a year and a couple of months now. All though this is not my first "job" I can say its the job where I have dealt with a lot of things and grown the most. I have also discovered some big pet peeves, some great lessons, and an enlightening moment that has led to a deep revelation. Which I am going to share with y'all in that order. Who knew being a server could be so deep and profound.

PET PEEVES 

1. I come to introduce myself and you cut me off OR say nothing at all. I can speak for majority of servers that this is a major no no. Allow us to introduce ourselves so you can know our names instead of calling every available server in the vicinity when you need something or have changed your mind about an order. For the silent folks please don't blank stare. I can't read your mind. 

2. When I am taking care of other guests, you call me out or obnoxiously wave to get my attention. The Golden rule applies here ladies and gents. Do unto others what you would like to be done to you. It is rude to interrupt and disturb someone else experience in that manner.

3. Asking for items sporadically instead of all at once constantly. When I come to your table, you have my undivided attention. There is a pattern and a flow to providing service for 4-5 other tables. You are not aware of what's going on back scene *you shouldn't be* but be conscious enough to realize that you are not that server only guest.

4. Eating or drinking 3/4 of whatever and deciding you didn't like it. Two reasons why this is my pet peeve. One, speak up and let your server know rather than seeking a manager and telling everyone else first but remaining silent otherwise. Two, it doesn't take that much to figure out you don't like something, please don't complain to get out of paying a bill.

5. Don't tip well or at all. Yet you have me run around for everything under the  sun in the restaurant, monopolize my time when it's most convenient for you, complain about things I can't control and get frustrated when I give suggestions in order to help better the problem.....but you leave great reviews/compliments with my manager -_- #epicfail

With discovering these pet peeves I have learned some important life lessons. One thing I have realized on my journey as a lover and disciple of Jesus Christ is that every situation or moment is an opportunity to learn more about Him, my Creator and Savior, and to discover who I am in Him, a queen to be, loving, caring, discipline, honest, hardworking, patient, and all that jazz. I say this not because this is always how I thought but because falling in love with Jesus is radically transforming my life and renewing my mind. I did NOT always Love myself or carry myself in high esteem, I still struggle with faults and insecurities but I have the greatest help, Holy Spirit, guiding me along the way. So thankful!

LIFE LESSONS

1. You will reap what you sow. I have discovered that generally the effort that you put forth is displayed in your tip amount. Do your best and leave no doubts.

2. Attitude is everything. I am known at work to be ridiculous corny and unusually happy. I learned that my joy is not dependent on temperamental humans or situations, it's founded on Christ alone. Attitude is contagious, it has a ripple effect meaning it has the ability to transmit from one person to the next. I've determine that negative energy directed at me will end with me. Choose joy, it's easier and causes less wrinkles. No one wants to work or live in a negative environment so don't contribute to it negatively. Play your part.

3. Teamwork makes the load easier to bear. I am bless to go to a sound Bible-Teaching church where you are taught how to apply the Word to your life, Jubilee Christian Church *shameless plug* and this year theme is Symphony. It's based on 1 Corinthians 12:11-27. This Bible passage speaks about how we all have a part to play, how no one position or gift is greater than another. So become a team player.

4. Work above the standard. It's easy to do the bear minimum and it's sad that it's become the norm. I have learned to work with excellence as if unto The Lord. It is a blessing that I have mobility in my limbs, air in my lungs, energy in my body, blood in my veins, and a job in this economy. I am not always successful but I like to try to work as if God was my supervisor. I am not always successful but it creates a shifts in my perspective.

5. Don't work expecting approval for everything that you do well. I have no expectations coming in to work in regards to my manager or my guests. Sounds weird but I have learned that us humans are unstable emotionally and waiting for approval or a compliment from them is the equivalent of waiting for the sun to cool down. Nothing against anyone but we as humans tend to be wrap up in our own lives and lose track of recognizing good.

6. Do not judge based on appearance. One of my most memorable moments as a waitress/server was serving a table of 3. At first sight the table did not look promising, the guests looked, and acted,  "ghetto". The server who originally was meant to serve them thought the table would be a waste of time and ask me to take them. As I took care if them I notice they were very polite, funny, and a genuinely pleasant table. Their bill all together came out to be $90-95 dollars. After boxing up their food and making sure they were all set I drop off their bill. I truly had no expectations but when I came back to the floor the gentlemen came and handed me the bill and thanked me for taking good care of them especially since the other server switch them out. I wish them a great day and open the bill to add the tip and was touch to see he left a note and $50 tip. You never know who you are in the presence of and how they might impact your life. Serve (in every essence of the word) well. We all have prejudices, learn and recognize yours and conquer them.

7. First and last impression are powerful. The most touching experience I've had so far is serving a married couple. They were older, somber, but nice. When I first introduced myself, all bubbly and whatnot, I notice a change in the woman's face after I said my name...but to be honest I didn't pay much attention. They were a very easy and laid back table and they didn't ask for much. At the end of their experience when I drop the bill the women thank me and shared with me that she and her husband were celebrating the anniversary of their daughters death. They chose to do that by going to all of her favorite places in Boston and wanted to end by eating at her favorite restaurant. I was so moved and then she said "Our daughter name was Jennifer, she went by Jenny and I think it was comforting to be taken care by someone like you, its like God knew we would need it today". Every life you come in contact with has a story. Listen.

I realize that just like some guests take customer service for granted I take God for granted as well and then a deep revelation hit me and in my spirit I heard.

"Daughter I am your GOD, the Creator, your Savior I am NOT your Magician"

Mind Blown. I don't know if you are like me but if I can be completely transparent with you I get into the habit of seeking God when I am in trouble, or need him to change a situation, or to be quickly amazed by something that satisfies my senses. But this is such a cheap replica to what he really wants to give us. He wants us to seek him for his PRESENCE.

In all of my of my pet peeves God spoke to me a loving message.

1. I speak to you everyday and I want to commune with you about everything in your life. But you have to be still and listen. Don't cut me off and cut me out.

2. My relationship with you is personal. Stop comparing and try to do things that is not you to grab my attention. You already have it.

3. I care about EVERYTHING in your life the big and the small, don't hold back anything from me. Tell me all of it. You don't need to run to everyone come to me.

4. You don't have to try anything to discover that it's not OF me and FOR your good. Don't stay in a dead place.

5. Don't speak well of me through words and live opposite of me through actions. Live for me completely.

I hope in all of my babble something spoke to you.

Love y'all,